My Ex-Boyfriend's House
written by Rusty Spell
Lisa said it's a-okay, she didn't like him anyway. I'll take her word if she'll take mine that in a night I'll be just fine. And I know she's right, and she knows I'm lying.
Christopher was all to me, and anyway adultery is commoner than heroine, as common as the state I'm in. And I know he's weak, and I know I'm unhappy. And I guess I'll go to my ex-boyfriend's house.
Periwinkles all around, the ocean making not a sound. I lost my hearing at a show, standing close in the front row. But I know it'll come back, and I know he will not.
Lisa drops her bathing top, her boyfriend gawking like a fop. Their cute love antics killing me, I wish they'd drift into the sea. But I know they'll stop, they'll be sad like me one day. And I guess I'll go to my ex-boyfriend's house.
To my ex-boyfriend's house. He's always been so nice to me. I hurt him 1993, but he always lets me in. To my ex-boyfriend's house. I sleep good on his living room floor, and he always leaves open his door with a nightlight in the hall.
Christopher, what have you done? I thought I set my switch on stun. You flipped it off with tuxedo vows, but now you're in another town. And now I am here in this two-story misery.
Options, options, what are those? The color of my panty hose? All the choices in the world, but I only want to be your girl. And now I am here in a thirtysomething episode. And I guess I'll go to my ex-boyfriend's house.
To my ex-boyfriend's house. He's always been so nice to me. I get drunk with him on daiquiris while tanning by his pool. To my ex-boyfriend's house. He doesn't expect anything, won't steal my heart with a gold ring from his mother's jewelry box. To my ex-boyfriend's house, though Lisa says it's a terrible idea, that I'll marry him also in a year. I'll just have to take that chance, I fear. To my ex-boyfriend's house.
Teddy Ruxpin
written by Rusty Spell
Can you and I be friends? We don't
even have to hold hands. I just want to be with you all day. I just want you and
I to play.
Cause it's a world of wonder when I'm with you if we're at the mall or park or
fair or school or house or zoo. Oh, will you be my Teddy Ruxpin friend?
My sister says you're hot. I tell her that you're not. But I know that you are. You are my wishing star. My teacher says I'm smart, that I'm sweet as a Sweet Tart. But I'd make all Ds for you. And I'd be sour if you wanted me to. Cause it's a world of wonder when I'm with you if we sing or act or dance or fall or talk or laugh or moo. Oh, will you be my Teddy Ruxpin friend?
There's a secret that I keep. When I let it out I weep. I've told Alice, Jack, and Lou, and now I'll tell you too that it's a world of wonder when I'm with you, and Teddy Ruxpin friends are the friends that say "I do." So will you be my Teddy Ruxpin friend? Oh, will you be my Teddy Ruxpin friend?
Young James
written by Rusty Spell
Though I care for you, and would not dare hurt you, I'm aware that you are not wise enough for me. If I'm breaking your heart as a way of teaching you a lesson, then start to learn that lesson well, young James.
To my door you came, Watchtowers
in your hand, and though you seemed so tame, I knew I wanted you. It was
tempting, you know. You were so young I had to give it a go. But now you must
leave me, young James.
You say you won’t find a lady like me, but it’s all in your mind. I’m not a
lady at all. I’m a woman, dear boy. And you’re just a little thing that once
brought me joy. I believe that will be all, young James.
Make It Funky
written by Rusty Spell
Love songs have always got it wrong. No one can feel that way, though they want to. But it's better what I feel for you. Love songs are naive and they're dumb, written for kids by the radio crying at night, but we're grown-ups and I love you more than that.
Their words come gushing from the
fountains. You're so much more than mountains, more than moonbeams, more than
abstract goop that they spit out. And I know this idea is so old. Shakespeare
already wrote this same poem: Sonnet 130. You can look it up.
But you and me, we make it funky. We rent DVDs and play Monopoly. You and me, we
make it funky. We get refills for free at the Applebee's. And what is more
romantic than that?
I make web pages about you. People can Google you, while my eyes do. They should
be jealous that you're in my room. And they know there's no one else but you.
Love songs can't say that's true. Some sort of voodoo Has made what you do have
this effect on me.
Yeah, you and me, we make it funky. Even Simon Legree couldn't beat you and me.
Yeah, you and me, we make it funky. Love songs can't compete, no matter how
sweet. And what is more romantic than that?
I Want You, Girl
written by Rusty Spell
You are so fine. I wanna make you mine. But you don't care if I live or die. I need you bad. This love's not just a fad. I'll be your dad: I'll be your sugar dad. My friends they say, I should let you get away. But I think about you every day. I'll set a trap. I'll find you at The Gap. You're the only one can end this crap.
Girl... You got me on my knees, and I am beggin' you, please. I want your love to increase. Oh, girl... Please come home with me, and I will make all time freeze. Won't even mind if you tease.
I need you more. I've started keeping score. But you still think that I'm a crashing bore. You are for me. I wish that you could see. Please look me up in the directory. In your back yard, I stare at you so hard. It makes me wanna charge like Master Card. When you're at school, I see you lookin' cool. Like Kevin Spacey, girl, you know you rule.
Girl... I've fallen hard for you, and you should fall for me too. I think you know that it's true. Oh, girl... I've given every clue I want you part of my crew. I'd stick to you like glue.
You and me, don't that sound good? Say it over-over like I wish you would. Me and you, that sound nice? Please don't take your older sister's advice. We and we, meant to be. I learned it fifth period in History. Just like Napoleon and Josephine. Lovin' like ours has not been seen.
Girl... I know I can have any girl that I want, and that I should consider it your loss. But when I look into your eyes, I know that I gotta fight for what's mine. I love you girl...
Girl... If you get into my car, we could drive to the stars or to an all-ages bar. Oh, girl... You know I'm stayin' chaste for you. I'm goin' to wait. It doesn't matter how late. Oh, girl... Your perfect hair. And your blank little stare And your white underwear. Yeah, girl... Your tiny physique, your name's Dominique. You shop at Clinique. Girl... I'm singing to you. What else can I do? You should love me true. Oh, girl... I'm fadin' away. There's nothing to say. Please don't think I'm...
I Cry I Cry I Cry I Cry I
Cry
written by Rusty Spell
On the last day of the world, in a dusty antique bar, where once I was your girl, and you loved me like a star, I see those days are gone, like the world where we belong. And there's nothing left to do but cry.
And I cry and I cry and I cry and I cry and I cry, while we die and we die and we die and we die and we die. But no one seems to care. No one even cares to say goodbye.
I can feel it coming now, like a slow and smoky train. I recall the perfect smell when we kissed out in the rain. So now the warning's come, and my head's between my knees. And there's nothing I can do but cry.
Cherries
written by Rusty Spell
A blonde-haired beauty is a sight to behold when you're newly-single from a six year run. And I don't know but I've been told, that the Good Lord above likes for us to have fun. If you want to try your hand now, she's standing over there by the pink punch bowl. She's the cute one dressed in pink too; don't be fooled by her camouflage.
Dance, dance. Ask her to dance. I don't care if you think she won't say yes. And I don't care if your moves are old: Chubby Checker did the twist his entire life.
Look, you're really going now. Have you ever seen a smile like hers? Did you ever realize that a party can completely change your life? Don't think ahead too much, just enough to keep up with your new friend. If I were more than your shoulder's angel, I'd be tempted to jump off and join right in.
Cherry Coke, cherry wine, cherry jubilee. Cherry you, cherry me, merry cherry we.
Boy, you better get to dancin'... Dance... all night long. Dance... with this girl. Dance... all night long. Dance... with your girl.
The Snake Charmer
written by Rusty Spell
I'm out of the shower with a towel on
my head, and I'm playing the flute on my soft bed. If I slid open the window
pane, all the snakes outside would go insane. Rikki-Tikki-Tavi was a mean
mongoose. He killed the snakes, but I set them loose with the music from my
magic mouth. Now they're heading north instead of heading south.
And I'm the snake charmer, so bring all the snakes to me. If they're dead as
Laura Palmer, I'll wake them, just you see.
Now I'm all dressed with nothing to do, should be breaking like electric
boogaloo. I'm sitting crossed-legged on the ground, but there's nothing in my
basket now. Old Saint Patrick was an evil man. He drove the snakes out of his
land. But I guess that it's just as well, cause now I've got them in my spell.
I've got swirly eyes like an all-day sucker. I can make people think that they are a duck or a chicken. Yeah, I'm not a fake. But mostly I like to handle snakes. The serpent in the garden got a bum rap. Before him, Eve was taking a nap. He woke her up so he could show the world the places they couldn't go.
There Is You
written by Rusty Spell
I know that there is suffering, and I know that there is dying, and I know bad things are meant to be, and I know that it's the end of eternity.
But then I know that there is you, and that's all I need to know, that there is you. Please don't ever let me go. And I love you, and I need you, and all that I care about is you.
Lately, the earth's been like a drunken man reeling from all the booze we gave to him. And we know the crazy weather is a sign that soon we will have to see the end of time.
You and only you. Oh, you. You and only you. We're almost dead, our lives been bled, but one more time just let me look at you.
Hubba Hubba
written by Rusty Spell
We like our car with the spoiler on
its ass, but we stay in the back seat and save on gas. Don't wonder where we
are, don't even ask. Just get out our business, yeah our biz-naz. We love each
other and that's how it's always been. And everybody knows love's like a bottle
of gin. In the back of the car, we commit our favorite sin. We get more wild
than Huckleberry Finn.
If the Trans-Am is a rockin', then you know the rest. We both passed our STD
test. I don't need no Longitude. Thank God, he's very blessed. Hubba hubba, wow
wow, hubba hubba, baby baby yeah.
We met each other in a singles bar. Our good vibrations brought us from afar. We
couldn't possibly be more sexier than we are, and it doesn't hurt to have such a
kickin' car.
If the Trans-Am is a rockin', then you know the rest. We both passed our STD
test. I don't need no Wonderbra. Thank God, she's very blessed. Hubba hubba, wow
wow, hubba hubba, baby baby yeah.
Our Hurricane
written by Rusty Spell
Well, the beach it is lonely post-hurricane time. It's waiting for people in cars in a line on the highway, driving, waiting, wishing it wouldn't take so long.
And the houses are shambles, look well past their prime, though some are brand new and were left there just fine while the people are driving and hoping belongings inside aren't gone.
And we left the town with our lives intertwined with problems you had and pretended were mine while I did the same to you, insisting it was never me.
And the palm trees are swaying, the ones that are standing. And I'm simply obeying the morals my grandfather had. 'Cause I'd leave tomorrow if I had my own way. And I'd never come back here, and I'd never have to see you again.
Our toothbrushes are packed while our bathroom decays, and our room's been crashed in on the bed where we lay: A brilliant metaphor for you and me, baby.
And your guitar is broken, my Chia Pet shaved and I can't help but picture the large tidal wave that I'd have let wash me away if I would have stayed behind.
Oh But Why
written by Rusty Spell
Oh, he thrills me inside. Oh, he turns
out the light. Oh, he glistens and glides. Oh, makes me feel right. Oh...
But why don't you do any of those things? Won't you show me that you care, and
make me dance on air?
Oh, he owns several cars. Oh, he plays a sitar. Oh, he knows Ringo Starr. Oh, he
makes love not war. Oh...
But why don't you do any of those things? Can't you just change from A to B, and
finally please me?
Every night there's this boy who appears in my dreams. He reminds me of a lot of
people, but he's no one that I've ever seen. And he's perfect...
But why are you just any old thing? Aren't you the boy I really love, Not the
boy that I dream of? Oh, why won't you be the boy of my dreams? And you will be
the one I keep, else I'll find love in my sleep.
Should I Talk Slower?
written by Rusty Spell
I thought about it, what you said to me that day, how the thoughts were crystal perfect in your mind. I don't really doubt it, that we weren't cut out that way. I know you were only being kind. But should I talk slower when I say that I love you? Because you don't really seem to understand. And could I grow weaker, could I faint and break into? Would it cause you to finally hold my hand?
And I never knew I could finish just thinking of you. Not a single touch in sight. I was only thinking of you.
If you don't love me, I'll evaporate and float away. I'll get torched in the sky like Icarus' magic wings. And when people listen to me, I will only say your name, your name, your name, your name, your name.
Poodle Skirt
written by Rusty Spell
I wasn’t seeing any action around here, hadn’t found a girl I liked in several years, but there’s some secret things that I know that helped me to get exactly where I needed to go. You were drinking a cherry phosphate when I asked you on a date. You said, "Why you just come on to my place? We can sit on my bed and listen to 'Chantilly Lace.'"
Hey, you got your bobby socks on. Hey, you’re gonna get my rocks off by wearing that poodle skirt. You sure know to flirt with me. I’ve got a time machine.
You asked about my digital watch and if you were just a notch on my post. I said I traveled really far for you, babe. You’re the coolest girl of any age. Cause you are just perfect for me. You like making out at drive-ins and Elvis and Jerry Lee. And I think I’m going to stay here with you. We’ll have a kid who will be my age in 2002.
Finally
written by Rusty Spell
When all the hourglass sands on your mantle have gone, when all the painters are dead, when you take out a small loan for a pint of Oxygen, that's when I'll know you're in love.
I know the time will come someday, but for now it is all that I can do to live. None of your reincarnated souls have ever known I've been alive, but someday my karma will win.
Then the endless summer. Then the days when my death spots are gone. Then the boring washeteria. Then the hard chore of falling in love.
In love, in love, in sweet love I've fallen in love, in love in love. Love, in love, in love in sweet love, I've fallen in. Oh, yes I've fallen in love.
Take an account of the days, months, and eons the planet's been and keep all those numbers in your mind. Add the time QVC commemorative plates take to rise in value. That's how long I've waited for you.
Through the middle ages. Through the days of the factory scene. Through the Reagan Era. Through the times when I have been in love.
Y3K you finally looked around and saw me standing there lined by the ATM machine. When Jesus peeped through the purple clouds and angels' trumpets blasted, that's when you actually kissed me.
Then internal fireworks. Then the sound of a race's last breath. Then I heard us dying. But finally we'd fallen in love.
In love, in love, in sweet love we've fallen in love, in love in love. Love, in love, in love in sweet love, we've fallen in. Finally fallen in love.
I Know It's Not Me
written by Rusty Spell
I want to know where you go. I want to know who you see. I want to know who you love. I know it's not me. I know it's not me.
I know where you go at night. I know who you see when I'm not there to see you. I know who you love. I know it's not me. I know it's not me.
I don't want to know where you go. I don't want to know who you see. I don't want to know who you love. I know it's not me. I know it's not me.
Nothing Like Me
written by Rusty Spell
She’s a lacto-ovo, but I am a vegan. I don’t know how we got together at all. She’s an agnostic, but I am a pagan. She is so short that she makes me look tall. She knows Matador records has corporate backing, but she still won’t throw her Yo La Tengo away. She doesn’t like my napping. I don’t like her snacking. I don’t care at all she broke up with me today.
Cause she’s nothing like me. I know now that I must have just been bored. Cause she’s nothing like me. I don’t care if she leaves. This swimming pool of my tears will drown me no more.
She likes Rossellini, but I like Fellini. It’s such a shock she stood out from the rest. My favorite kitschy TV is I Dream of Jeannie. She is so dumb she thinks Bewitched is the best. I’ve got an ironic T-shirt she sometimes borrows. I can tell that she is wearing it genuinely. I don’t like her depression. She doesn’t like my sorrow. I don’t care at all if she is running from me.
Cause she’s nothing like me. I wonder why I thought she was my twin. Cause she’s nothing like me. I don’t care if she leaves. In fact, I’m ready for this all to end. Yeah, she’s nothing like me. I know now it was nothing but a game. Cause she’s nothing like me. I don’t care if she leaves. I need to find someone who is the same as me.
Just for You
written by Rusty Spell
I'm moving in slow motion, and it's all because of you. I needed you like a soothing lotion. I've discovered eighty shades of midnight blue. Why did you do it? Could you not stand to see our baby born? I knew it would be the end of me when you left in the morning time.
So I was always on your mind? What a
line. That song just suits you fine. I'm divine you said, but now I've lost my
shine. My insides are knotted up like twine just for you.
If God cares for all the brokenhearted cause he knows they need his life to see,
then why when I pray for my departed does he turn his wicked back on me? I'll go
to hell now for saying that, and I'm about to die. Oh well now. On top of that's
the suicide.
Laugh at me after I pass. Just be crass. I don't deserve any less. I confess I'm
a lousy mother, yes. My bloody dress is making such a mess just for you.
Sprite-Like
written by Rusty Spell
And the sprite-like little girl is too young, and the sprite-like little girl is too far away, and she's a full three points smarter, and I'll never get to see her again.
Take It Higher
written by Rusty Spell
Let my love take you higher than you've ever been before.
Are you still mine? Can we recline? Dinner and wine? Romantic, divine?
No, but you're mine. We can recline. Dinner and wine. Romantic, divine.
This time.
Copyright (c) Apr 2011 by The Mnemonic Devices and Love and Letters Music